Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Enable New Device Flag

Enable New Device Flag

Yesterday, rather than eat lunch like any other normal person on this planet, I decided I would go completely insane and go shopping for Christmas presents. Those of you who have actually met and know me (all two of you!) probably know how out of the ordinary this really is. To say that "I'm not one for shopping," is a bit like saying, "the Pope is a tad religious." It's really quite the understatement of understatements. I think, if pressed, I would prefer a slow painful death over shopping. (But, wait, what exactly is the difference between these two options again?)

So, I braved the construction, crowds, commercialism, traffic, lack of parking, barrage of all things Santa, and all things otherwise associated with Christmas shopping by going down to my local camera store. (Shh. Don't tell, but I've secretly purchased Mom and Dad a digital camera for Christmas.) While I'm at the camera store, purchasing my cheap but oh-so-easy-to-use newfangled, spangly, shiny, pre-fabricated digital device, the sales clerk says to me (don't you hate it when they talk?) "would you like a free printer with this camera?" Instead of taking my free but worthless printer, I opted for a discount on a printer I had been lusting after for several months (perhaps even years.) So, I fit my wide body (it prints 11x14 images so no more trips to the photo lab for me!) printer into the back of the hatchback and headed home with the last of my Christmas presents, and some semblance of my sanity, in tow.

This morning (yes, I do get up in the morning!) I get to work and there's an email sitting in my inbox. "You're new laptop is here!" the IT guy from work cheerily proclaims. So now I'm thinking (and you know how hard it is to turn that on) "what, has somebody turned on my 'enable new devices' flag or something? Why am I getting all of this NEW STUFF right before Christmas? What am I going to do with all of this crap and how can I possibly fix it all when it all breaks at the same time?" (and you just know it will.)

So, despite being pleasantly happy and surrounded with gobs of "new electronic smell" this Christmas season, I'm dreading the fateful February day when it will all blow up and I won't even have a blasted cell phone left on which I can call somebody to whine about the binary corpses. Just imagine what the body count's going to be when the laptop, wide body printer, new 20 in imac and digital camera all go kaput at the very same instant (and you know they will. We program them that way for your viewing pleasure.)

Oh the horrors of it all. Now, what does this button do again...?

Until next time...


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